Quiet 

LieLie has gone to the opera in Charlotte with friends. Finn is in a Nerf war outside. Momo and Appie are asleep and my house is completely silent. At this stage of my life I notice the silence and not the noise. A bomb could go off and I wouldn’t startle but if it gets silent I start getting nervous. By 8am I’ve heard “mommy” and the sound of things crashing and breaking and slamming so often I have a twitch. One day that will change and my longing to be alone, in buttery silence, for just five minutes, will become loneliness. I will  miss the noise and the mess and the chaos . I already miss it when they go to school. I already dread the silence. The thought of them leaving home one day rips my heart out. Thinking about it seriously takes the oxygen right out of the air.  Hopefully, they will be bratty, drum playing, sweaty teenagers with awful manners so I’ll be able to bear it. Hopefully, I will get my own life by then and be making my own noise. Hopefully, I will have formed a grey haired hip hop band or something. Hopefully, Momo and Appie will live to be older than tortoises and spend days in my lap.  Hopes run high in the silence. 

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