Coming home

Homecoming is a big deal. One week of dress up days (at my school and hers) and spirit events and cheerleaders and marching bands. Then finally the big event- foot ball and crowning the princes and princesses on Friday night!! Miss Coralie Steenhuyse was crowned Sophomore princess by a vote from her peers this year and took home the glitter!! She also rode in a parade float as the character Coraline and had a fabulous time in general❤️

I’m ready to sleep for a week but the fun never ends and we are off to a party!

Today, my Lord, was long

Teenagers are awkward. Some don’t have feathers on their neck yet. Some serenade half grown chickens in the yard….

Homecoming is tomorrow. Today was throw back Thursday. LieLie and I have very different ideas about the 90’s!

I’m pretty sure I wasn’t this tired in the 90’s.

Here are some things I heard people say today unedited and in real life, not kidding.

Student “Ms. Johnson, am I circumcised?”

Doctor “mitochondria really is the powerhouse of the cell”.

Student “do you squeeze eggs out of your chickens?”

Student “can you make an ASMR of our study guide for YouTube. Maybe you could chew a pickle and unpack a box so we could like looking at you better.”

Friend “maybe if we had all told our dad’s when we got raped in college instead of hiding it they wouldn’t be defending Kavanaugh now.”

Son “mommy can you order me this hat, I’ve already got the rest of my costume”

Daughter “how can I make my hair into a blue bob for an hour tomorrow during school?”

Sigh….2018. I yelled “you are a meme” at the bewildered doctor and pretty much ran away from everyone else.

To end on a cheerful note here is a snake watching Finn bat and LieLie’s super cute squad❤️

Last day of single digits

He pooled all of his birthday money and bought a Nintendo Switch today. He might actually pop from the excitement. AND it was the first day of cotillion class. He’s been waiting years to go waltz with the ladies. Seriously, no boy has ever been more excited to go learn manners and dancing in the history of the deepest Deep South. He will be fully prepped for his first military ball or die trying! I wish they would teach shirt folding and flossing along with how to use a fish fork but that is just me.

Big day

We celebrated Finn today. He turns ten on Monday. Double digits. A child in giant man sized shoes (literally) with giant man sized worries (figuratively). I try to protect him from the news and the woes of mankind but somehow he always knows the death count of every typhoon and the latest fungus killing trees “coming to a forest near you.” He takes in all of the information that the rest of us block and filter all day long and then tries to file it all away or make sense of it. He doesn’t realize life doesn’t make sense. He thinks he might need that info later. It might even save our lives. That’s just the way he works, he can’t help it. He takes in all the good stuff, too. He brings me information full of love and light like they are precious jewels when ever he can – mummies found and cures discovered and gas prices dropping…. but he also asked for iodine pills for his go bag for his birthday. He realized that if Duke nuclear power has an issue when I’m at work, his school will evacuate him and I will go with my students and not with him. He needs to be prepared to save his thyroid and LieLie’s without my assistance. Then he realized his school doesn’t have enough buses to save them all, no school does, and asked me who goes first in a nuclear evacuation. I told him the truth, historic protocol dictates women and children first, starting with the youngest. However, in all of the years of nuclear power generation there had been very few accidents and that I wouldn’t live here with him if I didn’t feel like he was safe. He said “I’ll feel safer when I’m well trained and able to deploy to North Korea when the need arises this isn’t our only nuclear issue”. So there is that, too. We don’t even have cable but he’s a digital native and this is what happens. So today was play like you are still 9 day. He was a catcher and a pitcher. He got two new friends and took them out for fried yucca. He had a surprise party in the park with his besties and was actually surprised!! Many thanks to LieLie and her friends for making it happen! Then the whole party walked to the movies. It is straight uphill so they burned off the cake and were ready for pizza upon arrival. Then his oldest bestie came home for a video game playing sleepover. And now they are squealing and laughing in the dark and I am holding my last moments of being the parent of a single digit worry wart close to my heart. I love him. Just as he is.

Rape Culture in the US

Find any large group of women in America and ask them to raise their hand if they have never been the victim of molestation, sexual assault or rape and very few hands are going to go up. Then ask them if they reported it. Maybe one hand goes up. But telling didn’t do any good because nothing happened. But more than likely they never told anyone except a girlfriend or a therapist about it because that is the culturally acceptable thing to do. God forbid you bring it up later because one of the criminals that touched your body is about to become one of the most powerful people on Earth. Girls can’t remember what happened to them, they are making it up for political gain (because who doesn’t want to look like a victim on the world stage?!) and boys will be boys and don’t mean to hurt they just have hormones. Unless you are a boy of course. If you were molested by a priest decades ago then by all means bring it up now, the media, the general public and the justice system believes that men remember the crimes against them, are totally believable and they get millions for their troubles. Even if they weren’t raped. Even if they were just groped, terrified and silenced. So to be clear Catholic boy gets groped by a priest, tells 30 years later and gets millions of dollars and public sympathy and outrage. He has no proof or photos or “evidence”. Same thing happens to a girl except the perp isn’t a priest and she has risked her career to do it and is not seeking financial gain and she is not offered public sympathy, assumed to be lying and gets death threats for her audacity. The boys should get sympathy and money and whatever they need to make things right for them but so should every little girl and grown woman. It should empower and not destroy to speak out against an assailant.

When we know better we should do better but it is still not the case. We hide sex crimes. We don’t report sex crimes. We don’t call the parents of the kid who grabs our kids butt in the hallway in the 7th grade and say “talk to your son about sexual assault.” We don’t have rape kits at high schools. We don’t say ‘lying about where you are going and drinking some beer is not a crime, sexual assault is, tell your parents right away’ to every teen in America. We don’t teach boys the buddy system and to watch their drunk friends for bad behavior. We don’t teach people to drink responsibly. We don’t do everything in our power to shut down rape culture once and for all. We need to start now. Until that happens, gender equality in this country is a pipe dream.