Today I did not cry

That’s a lie, I cried once but it was because I was proud and happy, not sad. Unrelated. Plus no one was looking so it doesn’t count anyway.

But I didn’t cry when it mattered. That much is true. I was serene and composed while Finn failed another hearing test. I was kind and polite when the audiologist indicated that she was a doctor and I wasn’t when I asked too many questions. I didn’t laugh when Finn corrected her pronunciation of tinnitus and she informed him without irony that “I’m too southern to do hard i’s.” I did everything I was supposed to do in that doctor’s office and I didn’t even say “bless your little heart you witch” when I was thinking it really loud with my Botox face on.

But I’m feeling all the feels about Finn’s soon to be hearing aids. I want his life to be perfect and easy and never need tiny new batteries. I’m excited about the science that will let him drown out background noise in restaurants with a flick of his phone. I’m filled with joy that he will hear me the first $&@!ing time I tell him to clean his room and he won’t be so worn out from school. I wish insurance would do its job and pay for them but I’m thankful for my education that allows me to be gainfully employed and do it myself.

There is no blood or guts or risk of opioid addiction with this fix and unlike so many things it is fixable.

Bless his little lipreading heart, for real.

I am the chicken

Somehow the coop door got shut tonight before the chickens went to bed at sundown. My fine feathered friends had to adapt to the unsettling situation when it got dark and they were stuck outside. One knocked on the glass door with her beak like a tiny Lassie. She was trying to sound the alarm and it worked. I arose from my couch to see what was the matter! Her flock couldn’t go to roost so they decided to get high. Not smoking reefer behind the garage high, the other kind. One went to sleep in a tree by the grill and another one went all the way up on the roof. I had to perform a daring rescue for the roof hen involving the neighbors really tall ladder and Posey riding down on my head because I needed my hands for climbing. The neighbor said she was surprised I had any friends considering the nonsense I get up to on a daily basis. But I get it, the chicks were afraid, and they had the right idea going high in the cold and the dark when shelter isn’t an option.

I have spent much of the past three years going high. It took a really long time to get divorced. Being at the mercy of the court system, trying to get full custody of the kids and becoming a single income family overnight made me feel like a chicken locked out of its house on a daily basis. My coop as I knew it was gone. I had to decide which tree was safe to roost in and how to keep my chicks from falling out of my new nest while I was still building it. But all of those matters were laid to rest in 2018. We’ve spent the last six months getting out of the tree and learning to walk on solid ground again. We’ve found our new normal and equilibrium but we relish the idea of ringing in 2019. The newest of New Years will be welcomed with chins up and two feet firmly on the ground. Adios 2018 I hope I never see the likes of you again!

Mood Ring Eye

World’s most boring cartoon strip:

Finn’s eyes were this color last night when he was jolly and washing dishes like a real man (shirtless instead of apron🤦🏽‍♀️).

But this morning he woke up with eyes this color, grumpy and feverish- so we went to the doctor. He will live👍🏼

When we came home my favorite child had pulled all of the blankets off of the furniture and made a nest on the mini trampoline. 🐶

But my favorite son thought that looked like a great place to recuperate and booted him out. Now the old man is tattling on the young one. 🐣

And one throw back to me and LieLie on this day five years ago – She was Finn’s age and I had braces😆👩‍👦

Redcoats

Finn “why does this Christmas light display indicate the Red Coats are coming? That is not very Christmasy.”

Mateo “those are toy soldiers, Finn.”

Finn “they are wearing Red Coats and that one has a cannon👈🏻!”

Tripless

We are suppose to be on a trip but life got in the way, several times in fact, so we are at home. It turns out that home is pretty great when there are no jobs/sports/homework, etc. to contend with. I’m loafing, with a side of Netflix and local tourism. In fact, come the first of the year, I might not leave and you will find me watching Netflix with a cat when I should be at work since I literally don’t know what day it is….

Yesterday the loafing involved a roller rink, a train ride and a carousel.

Bandwidth

It takes five minutes, a few brain cells not dedicated to surviving the day and the ability to stay awake while sitting still to write a blog post. I haven’t had those things for the last two months or the bandwidth to think of anything to say. But I made it to Christmas break! Like teachers everywhere I have whipped up a last minute Christmas and slept for days. Two weekends without my second job or a swim meet. One week of soaking up my kids like sunbeams and suddenly I’m all words.

So here is a recap of the last two months:

Halloween: Napoleon Dynamite and Captain Quint can to visit

Finn got baptized. We couldn’t get a good picture but it was a beautiful day.

The chickens grew up. Well guarded and herded about by their rooster, Momo the dog. The rains continued and LieLie made it onto the Jumbotron at NC State. I went to Vegas to see Phish with my girlfriends and restore my rain soaked soul next to a desert pool. The kids visited their cousins while I was gone.

Thanksgiving: KY, Aunt Kara’s house with the sweetest cousins and Mammoth Cave. We got lost on the way there, drove over a river on a one person barge, ate some free cheese, shot some guns and best of all held all of the babies as much as we could❤️

* I didn’t feed any Swiss cheese or drumsticks to the animals. I kept them for myself.

Then Christmas in Davidson, parades and snow, snow, snow! Something wet has been falling for months. I’m literally turning into Shrek in my swamp home. Somehow Finn is never cold, even after swim practice…. LieLie is swimming on the varsity school team. She’s really improving her times and her stamina❤️

Then finally Christmas break. A time of friends, rest, Aqua Man, Bohemian Rhapsody and Mary Poppins, long walks, slow swims and presents. I could stay like this forever- warm, dry, home together. But I will go quietly and calmly towards the New Year with my arms open wide. I will be ready to embrace 2019 and whatever it may bring because I’m home now, with both my chicks in the nest, savoring the gift of time, reflecting gratefully on 2018 and filling my cup with something other than coffee.

To anyone reading this- the world’s longest Christmas Card…….

May God Bless You and keep you in the last days of this year and all through the next.

Much love from my house to yours.

Jana

Halloween Season

We went to the pumpkin patch on a warm day between the storms. No one would cooperate with posed pumpkin patch family pictures like in the salad days. Apparently these are the gourd days because we still had a fabulous time.

Here are some past examples that happen to be readily available. They make me LOL.

We are still working on our costumes over here. But in case you are wondering, LieLie named her pumpkin Mariah Carey and created a diva pumpkin habitat for her. She will not be carved, just made up and propped up.

Divas have designer dogs and clearly Momo is a perfect example of one.